I’ll keep it simple. I’m pregnant, he misled knowing I was pregnant, I didn’t know, he break up with me while pregnant, still didn’t know, we were still being intimate with each other, I find out he cheated, and this is where we are now … I required so much to have a traditional pedigree … 2 parent household … and in a relationship with the father … no disrespect to those who co-parent but I simply never drawn that for myself. I can go down the schedule as to why I feel and many parties around him feel as if he is not ready for a child. He even required an abortion and I only considered it because of him. But the straw that broke the camels back was the duplicity. In my looks, me and this child are one. So anything that hurts me can hurt this babe( literally, I’m afraid the stress will cause me to abort) I simply cannot allow him to have that strength over my life. Right now,( not set in stone) I don’t want him a part of this journey and paternity doesn’t make a father. I’m open to change but I don’t expect it from him. I have no desire to get back with him or anything.
What I am fight with is … how do I “lets get going” of all this anger? How do I sleep at night?( I haven’t been able to sleep or ingest enough and I know that might hurt my child and I don’t want that) How do I accept this? How do I move on? All I feel is emptiness and rage.
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