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I feel as if I lost the connection

So a few months ago, I had the weirdest physical knowledge as I was jaunting mushrooms.

I made what I would consider a reasonable dose of 2g, desegregated with lemon liquid to spike up its potency.

A little baggrund info, I was still battling my additiction with weed and I wasnt in the right place to jaunt. But I’m reasonably suffered and I concluded nothing of it, except that I missed the experience maybe too much.

Well during the trip I would smoke as usual, which to me at the time was too much, and like any other day I wouldnt do much else than feel sloppy and sit on my pc and play video games videogames. I felt a lot of bodily impressions, principally feeling nausia and disagreeable in my posture. It was like I couldnt ground my figure and stand firmly.

It riled me, hitherto intrigued me so much that the following weekend I tried it again with the same dose to try and figure out what was going on in my physical body. This time around I did the same as before, too much weed and videogames, which still wasnt how I demanded the trip-up to go. I still felt awkward and unmotivated, I didnt know what I want to get do or how I should feel about it. Overall, it was very confusing.

But then something eerie happened. I tried to stretch out my back, because I felt so close-fisted in my lower abdoment, and I suddenly felt a big pinching stretch. It was a distressing elongate and I immediately got nausiating and massed, I started having an intense cold sweat and was almost like I was about to pass out as I sat down on my bathroom feeling somewhat scared what the fuck is up. I panicked I divulge something in my back, but it I wasnt in physical pain.

Now since then, I’ve not felt the same. Before this, I used to often be attached by intense spirits of joy, sadness or exactly general familiarity of my life. I would get explosions of muse and motivation to do arts and do music, but since this I’ve felt different. I wouldnt say numb, but something sort of indifferent.

The funny thing is I have made more efforts to change, ceasing my bad attire with gras without suspicion or suspense as I be applicable to, but at the same time I’m not feeling agitated about new things either.

Spirituality used to bring me this sort of like “childlike wonder” about life, but ever since that journey I havnt cared so much better about it.

I learned and read about chakras through spirituality, among many other topics that induced me, and how you could “cut” your chakra connect, and part of me fears thats what happened that day.

Despite this, I’ve find more at ease. Ive been slowly regaining power over my life and I dont suspicion determining mistakes or how my future is about to change. Too, Ive noticed how my statements on this sub( and my own personal life in general) have been received more positvely since( idk if thats any manifestation of anything, precisely an watching)

In short-lived, I feel I am doing better in a practical purposes, but feel like I am missing the feeling load of everything there is. Idk if thats good or bad, on one pas I miss watching a video and feeling like it’s speaking to me on a personal level, on the other I’m not as psychotic/ caught up with all the details and feel more focused.

This has all been a gradual reform and see ever since that intense physical ordeal. Any insights would be greatly appreciated.

Love

submitted by / u/ newthrowgoesaway [ association ] [ mentions ]

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