Hi all-Been a sub on here for a while and love reading over the topics/experiences. I’ll just get to it. My mother was having some out of nowhere heart and liver issues last Monday (21st). Had fluid in the lungs and heart. It got better in the hospital, and they were about to let her out. Then she got a bit worse again. But nothing that was life threatening. Then I got a call from the doctor stating they are trying to resuscitate her, and that her heart stopped. I rushed over there as fast as possible, screaming to the universe to help me. I got there and she was gone. This Sunday (27th), she left this place way too young, and it feels like a light went out.
I’ve been on a spiritual path for a while now. But what just happened, has really knocked the life and light out of me. I feel there was this connection of love that was just cut. And I no longer have a motherly figure that is full of love in my life. I have so many regrets. There were so many times where I didn’t hang out with her when she wanted to see me. So many more times I should have told her how important and loved she was. I just feel I should have been there. And knowing she passed away without me or anyone there is breaking my heart in half. I’m sitting here at my house looking at the Christmas present I bought her. Was just waiting for her to get out.
I’d like to believe that she is having the time of her life now. In a place of light and love. She was such a service to others type of person. Although she was self destructive, she was so full of love and kindness to others. Would have done anything in the world for anyone. And she’s gone.
I feel broken right now, and I don’t know how to fix that light in me that went out.
Thank you for reading. I just needed to say this.
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