boyfriend doesn’t understand me

TLDR: had a spiritual waken while living together with an adament anti-spiritual boyfriend and don’t feel good about it

I’ve been in a long term relationship with my boyfriend for 4 years. At the commencement of it I was quite an adament atheist due to a bad look of belief and spirituality. then material happened and I acquired a great deal of ease in spirituality and started to believe there is something – I don’t consider myself any real sect but a sort of combination of christianity buddhism. But for example, I believe there’s some sort of afterlife and I hope to find connect with my loved ones.

My boyfriend is normally super supportive and is literally the sweetest. But lately it’s been shown that we are not always a great fit anymore when it comes to philosophy. While I starte dbeing more spiritual, he is still an atheist( even more so than I ever was, and the’ annoyed atheist nature’ to boot ). Because of that, I’m not really open towards him about what I conclude and how I deal with trauma, which wasn’t a problem at first, but now we have moved in together and it’s getting complicated. For speciman, he jokes about’ displeasure of God’ a good deal … which doesn’t is agreeing with me. He also has the tendency to look over my shoulder a great deal, which holds me back from enjoying sections about religion and spirituality. And I was buying crystals the other day and he was making fun of it as well – and I don’t think he realises that it hurts. He certainly thinks it’s just’ some thing’ and ok to construct jokes about.

I don’t crave this to become a big thing or anything, but I am scarcity the freedom to experience the world as I see it and feel guessed for my impressions( although he has technically doesn’t only knew them ). I realise a good deal of is due to a lack of knowledge on his part about what spirituality can involve and how it’s not all woo-woo, but it doesn’t even feel like something I can discuss with him. I still desire him very much but I’m scared and don’t know how to deal with it. I don’t want to break up because of something like this, but I also don’t want to hide myself either…

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