How to deal with deep grief?

Hey there,

it’s been ten months since I “ve just lost my” soulmate. We absolutely were soulmates and sounded from the first time we ever talked, were always together and shared everything for the 12 times that followed. As much as it was the greatest gift in “peoples lives” I feel crushed and like a phantom since she’s died. I’m only 35 and have probably a long time ahead of me without her. I’ve always believes in a God and blis but all of my ideologies are smashed as well.

I’m incessantly questioning myself where she’s pas and why she’s travel. I ask myself if we’re ever going to meet again …

I’m once doing a care but I want to spiritually find my armistice somehow as well – if that is even possible. We both were so determined to build the life of our dreams and creating a wonderful life for us and many others. I really don’t understand why she had to die so early and miserably and I’m all alone in this world now as we only wanted to give and been wonderful.

I wonder if anyone now has some insight on the topic of loss, death, a probable blis etc. I simply want to believe again but most of the time everthing feels pointless to me.

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