Kind of wish I was religious

The closest I get to being spiritual is probably either being in the woods or stepping with high winds and rain on my hair.

Anybody else get goosebumps sometimes? I can’t tell whether I’m various kinds of offsetting myself get them or they just occur when I get a certain shall “theyre saying” ominous feeling.

Got to say it’s a bit boring sometimes being dreadfully critically minded. Kind of wish I is accountable to a doctrine, but at the same time I certainly don’t want to lose track of the simple things that matter most in life-time. Might be more of a social or name hope than anything, if that clears sense.

So I’m English and was raised Catholic. I can’t for the life of me be Christian. Tried and I exactly have too many issues with it. I even read Genesis and I was like nah this is too horrid. Sadly though knowledge of our indigenous pre-Christian religion was mostly destroyed or debased by the Church( thanks chaps ), such that merely clues here and there remain. There’s a part of me that likes the idea of a mad belief connected to the earth where the timbers or the cave or maybe the coast or the hill top is our temple. I expect the esthetics of North American indigenous doctrine ring a bell now, as does that of the Finno-Ugric peoples in Europe. And I saw this video of a guy playing a neanderthal bone flute and it truly talked to me. Primeval cave traces intrigue me. I like that smell of primeval awe and clarity. Shinto is intriguing in this vein, but I’m not sure what benefit there is to swiping’ kami’ on top of natural things as they are.

I’ve tried the whole Germanic paganism thing but our knowledge of it isn’t perfect and I’m not sure how down I am for Norse mythology and polytheism. The statement’ Odin’ has a bit of a resonance with me for some reason. Elves/ brownies/ fairies/ whatever I “ve got something” for. But mainly natural elements, extremely when mad and free, are what I’m drew attention to. And you don’t need be religious for that! But I say, I’m drawn to the aesthetics, the community if nothing else. Like there are these Russian pagan conservative ecovillages which intrigue me. I’m quite an introvert and well individualist, but I dunno having a habit you belong to feels like something I’m wanting. Everybody’s a Jew, Catholic or Muslim or whatever and well I don’t feel I’m an anything. And I haven’t so far been blessed with the ability to start my own habit or resurrect some dead one As much as that petitions to me I’m not a storyteller. In another life I’d make a great Christian evangelist or sect commander

Anyway this is a rant I suppose you’d say. Inquisitive to hear if anybody else has same yearns?

submitted by / u/ swishswishswisharoo [ relate ] [ notes ]

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